HAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS
- Thread starter MaidenMadness
- Start date
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
wicker nomad said:
:err: Oh yeah I forgot to add.......... the ladies might not wanna see it LOL
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
wicker nomad said:maybe there's one for the ladies too 8)
Why would I wanna look for one of those :shock:
wicky
Moderator
>>>>>> Subject: What makes life 100% ?
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Ever wonder about those people who say they are
>>>>>> giving more than
>>>>>> 100%?
>>>>>>
>>>>>> We have all been to those meetings where someone wants
>>>>>> over 100%.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> How about achieving 103%?
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Here's a little math that might prove helpful.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> If:
>>>>>> A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
>>>>>>
>>>>>> is represented as:
>>>>>> 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
>>>>>> 22 23 24 25 26.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Then,
>>>>>>
>>>>>> H A R D W O R K
>>>>>> 8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%
>>>>>>
>>>>>> K N O W L E D G E
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> But,
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> A T T I T U D E
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%
>>>>>>
>>>>>> And,
>>>>>>
>>>>>> B U L L S H I T
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge
>>>>>> will get you close,
>>>>>> attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you
>>>>>> over the
>>>>>> top.
>>>>>> And look how far this will take you......
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> A S S K I S S I N G
>>>>>> 1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%
>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Ever wonder about those people who say they are
>>>>>> giving more than
>>>>>> 100%?
>>>>>>
>>>>>> We have all been to those meetings where someone wants
>>>>>> over 100%.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> How about achieving 103%?
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Here's a little math that might prove helpful.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> If:
>>>>>> A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
>>>>>>
>>>>>> is represented as:
>>>>>> 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
>>>>>> 22 23 24 25 26.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Then,
>>>>>>
>>>>>> H A R D W O R K
>>>>>> 8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%
>>>>>>
>>>>>> K N O W L E D G E
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> But,
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> A T T I T U D E
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%
>>>>>>
>>>>>> And,
>>>>>>
>>>>>> B U L L S H I T
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge
>>>>>> will get you close,
>>>>>> attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you
>>>>>> over the
>>>>>> top.
>>>>>> And look how far this will take you......
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> A S S K I S S I N G
>>>>>> 1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%
>
wicky
Moderator
LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES...(READ THEM OUT LOUD)
>> 1) That's not right.....................Sum Ting Wong
>> 2) Are you harbouring a fugitive?.........Hu Yu Hai Ding?
>> 3) See me ASAP............................Kum Hia Nao
>> 4) Stupid Man..............................Dum Gai
>> 5) Small Horse..............................Tai Ni Po Ni
>> 6) Did you go to the beach?................Wai Yu So Tan?
>> 7) I bumped into a coffee table............Ai Bang Mai Ni
>> 8) I think you need a face lift..............Chin Tu Fat
>> 9) It's very dark in here...................Wai So Dim?
>> 10) I thought you were on a diet...........Wai Yu Mun Ching?
>> 11) This is a tow away zone................No Pah King
>> 12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week.....Wai Yu Kum Nao?
>> 13) Staying out of sight.........................Lei Ying Lo
>> 14) He's cleaning his automobile...................Wa Shing Ka
>> 15) Your body odor is offensive..............Yu Stin Ki Pu
LOL LOL
>> 1) That's not right.....................Sum Ting Wong
>> 2) Are you harbouring a fugitive?.........Hu Yu Hai Ding?
>> 3) See me ASAP............................Kum Hia Nao
>> 4) Stupid Man..............................Dum Gai
>> 5) Small Horse..............................Tai Ni Po Ni
>> 6) Did you go to the beach?................Wai Yu So Tan?
>> 7) I bumped into a coffee table............Ai Bang Mai Ni
>> 8) I think you need a face lift..............Chin Tu Fat
>> 9) It's very dark in here...................Wai So Dim?
>> 10) I thought you were on a diet...........Wai Yu Mun Ching?
>> 11) This is a tow away zone................No Pah King
>> 12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week.....Wai Yu Kum Nao?
>> 13) Staying out of sight.........................Lei Ying Lo
>> 14) He's cleaning his automobile...................Wa Shing Ka
>> 15) Your body odor is offensive..............Yu Stin Ki Pu
LOL LOL
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
ewil said:you clever old git
wicky
Moderator
MaidenMadness
Active Member
yesterday i cathced fawlty towers and i almost pissed myself at this one:
there was this old woman that came to stay at the hotel
she had bad vision and hearing
she had a hearing aid but she kept it off so she wouldnt waste batteries.
so there was 85 pounds missing from her room and she came down to complain to basil about it
when she was doneranting and complaining to basil she said that her hearimg aid is on so he doesnt have to shout.
basil turned to his wife and started opening his mouth and acting like he was speaking but he wasnt
his wife joined in on it so the old lady tought her hearing aid was off so she turned it to maximum volume
when she had done that basil turned around to her and yelled mrs whatever
she jumped shocked and hit her head on a shelf
and while basils wife was comforting her, basil picked up a breadcrum from the floor and asked the old lady:" excuse me is this a piece of your brain" LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
there was this old woman that came to stay at the hotel
she had bad vision and hearing
she had a hearing aid but she kept it off so she wouldnt waste batteries.
so there was 85 pounds missing from her room and she came down to complain to basil about it
when she was doneranting and complaining to basil she said that her hearimg aid is on so he doesnt have to shout.
basil turned to his wife and started opening his mouth and acting like he was speaking but he wasnt
his wife joined in on it so the old lady tought her hearing aid was off so she turned it to maximum volume
when she had done that basil turned around to her and yelled mrs whatever
she jumped shocked and hit her head on a shelf
and while basils wife was comforting her, basil picked up a breadcrum from the floor and asked the old lady:" excuse me is this a piece of your brain" LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
MaidenMadness
Active Member
agreewicker nomad said:LOL LOL
One of the best series ever made
so far on the list
good things that came out of england:
- comedy
- football
- heavy metal
bad things:
- the english