HAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS
- Thread starter MaidenMadness
- Start date
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
Frenchy said:
LOL couldnt even manage 3rd
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
Frenchy said:they started with a defeat vs 'the pumas' and they finished with a defeat vs 'the pumas' :| :| ( i don't care LOL LOL )
btw i prefer a french defeat in rugby than a french defeat in Footy
maybe you will have the opposite LOL LOL:|
wicky
Moderator
"Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing comes out."
"Ah, that's nothing" said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"
"Actually," said the 80-year -old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."
"Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old.
"No, I pee every morning at 6:00. no problem at all."
"So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?"
"No, I have one every morning at 6:30."
Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, "You pee every morning at 6:00 and crap
every morning at 6:30. So what's so bad about being 80?"
"I don't wake up until 7:00."
"Ah, that's nothing" said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"
"Actually," said the 80-year -old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."
"Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old.
"No, I pee every morning at 6:00. no problem at all."
"So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?"
"No, I have one every morning at 6:30."
Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, "You pee every morning at 6:00 and crap
every morning at 6:30. So what's so bad about being 80?"
"I don't wake up until 7:00."
Bockaaarck
Active Member
wicky said:
LMAO LOL LOL LOL that's rubbish LOL
Bockaaarck
Active Member
wicky said:
LOL LOL LOL
wicky
Moderator
Retired People
Working people frequently ask retired people what
they do to make their days interesting.
Well for example, the other day my wife and I went
into town and went into a shop. We were only in there
for about five minutes.
When we came out, there was a cop writing out a
parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on
man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"
He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. So I
called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started
writing another ticket for having worn tyres.
So my wife called him a shithead. He finished the
second ticket and put it on the windshield with the
first. Then he started writing a third ticket.
This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused
him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.
We try to have a little fun each day now that we're
retired. It's important at our age.
Working people frequently ask retired people what
they do to make their days interesting.
Well for example, the other day my wife and I went
into town and went into a shop. We were only in there
for about five minutes.
When we came out, there was a cop writing out a
parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on
man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"
He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. So I
called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started
writing another ticket for having worn tyres.
So my wife called him a shithead. He finished the
second ticket and put it on the windshield with the
first. Then he started writing a third ticket.
This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused
him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.
We try to have a little fun each day now that we're
retired. It's important at our age.
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
A joke in memory of Henny
A duck was waiting to cross the road........
Chicken walks past and says......
Dont do it mate, you will never hear the end of it!!
A duck was waiting to cross the road........
Chicken walks past and says......
Dont do it mate, you will never hear the end of it!!
Bockaaarck
Active Member
rockin_plumber said:A joke in memory of Henny
A duck was waiting to cross the road........
Chicken walks past and says......
Dont do it mate, you will never hear the end of it!!
LMAO LOL LOL LOL
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
I was playing family fortunes online yesturday.....
Ok I was bored :|
and this question popped up.......
Ok I was bored :|
and this question popped up.......
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
A vampire bat returns to the roost with blood all round his face, all the
other bats get excited and ask him were he got it from. "Follow me" he
said.
So off they go, over hills, down rivers, through forests, and suddenly the bat stops, he said to the others, "see that tree over there, on the hill?"
"yes!" they reply.
Bat with blood says, "well i fucking didnt!"
other bats get excited and ask him were he got it from. "Follow me" he
said.
So off they go, over hills, down rivers, through forests, and suddenly the bat stops, he said to the others, "see that tree over there, on the hill?"
"yes!" they reply.
Bat with blood says, "well i fucking didnt!"
wicky
Moderator
A little boy blows up his balloon and starts flicking it all around the house with his finger. His mother tells him to stop it as he's liable to break something.
The boy continues. "Johnny!" mom screams. "Knock it off. You're going to break something." He stops and eventually mom leaves for a short trip to the store. Johnny starts up with the balloon again. He gives it one last flick and it lands in the toilet.
Mom comes in and while putting away the groceries gets the urge. A diarrhea run. She can hardly make it to the toilet in time and SPLASH, out it comes. When she's finished she looks down and can't believe what she's seeing.
Diarrhea everywhere! She's not sure what this big brown thing is in the toilet! She calls her doctor. The doctor is baffled as she describes the situation, but he assures her he'll be over shortly to examine everything.
When he arrives she leads him to the bathroom and he gets down on his knees and takes a long, hard look at the thing. Finally, he takes out his pen and sort of touches it to see what it might be and POP!
The balloon explodes and diarrhea is everywhere. On him, the walls, etc. Doctor! Doctor! Are you alright?" she asks.
He says, "I've been in this business for over 30 years, and this is the first time I've ever seen a fart!"
LOL LOL
The boy continues. "Johnny!" mom screams. "Knock it off. You're going to break something." He stops and eventually mom leaves for a short trip to the store. Johnny starts up with the balloon again. He gives it one last flick and it lands in the toilet.
Mom comes in and while putting away the groceries gets the urge. A diarrhea run. She can hardly make it to the toilet in time and SPLASH, out it comes. When she's finished she looks down and can't believe what she's seeing.
Diarrhea everywhere! She's not sure what this big brown thing is in the toilet! She calls her doctor. The doctor is baffled as she describes the situation, but he assures her he'll be over shortly to examine everything.
When he arrives she leads him to the bathroom and he gets down on his knees and takes a long, hard look at the thing. Finally, he takes out his pen and sort of touches it to see what it might be and POP!
The balloon explodes and diarrhea is everywhere. On him, the walls, etc. Doctor! Doctor! Are you alright?" she asks.
He says, "I've been in this business for over 30 years, and this is the first time I've ever seen a fart!"
LOL LOL