Bockaaarck
Active Member
I don't really know why, but this just made me laugh out loud 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAOcEljfqgw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAOcEljfqgw
HAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS
- Thread starter MaidenMadness
- Start date
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
Bockaaarck said:I don't really know why, but this just made me laugh out loud
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAOcEljfqgw
LOL LOL LOL :err:
Bockaaarck
Active Member
rockin_plumber said:
"Spiderpig, Spiderpig....." LOL LOL LOL
afraidtoshooteddie
Active Member
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
A seventy-five-year old man went to his doctor to get a sperm count. The
doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me
back a semen sample tomorrow."
The next day the seventy-five-year old man reappeared at the doctor's
office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as he had
received it on the previous day.
"Where's the sample?" asked the Doctor.
"Well, doctor, it's like this," the man explained. "First I tried with my right
hand, but that didn't work. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.
Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her
left, still no joy. She even tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then
with her teeth out, and still nothing."
"I see.." said the Doctor dubiously. "Then what did you do?"
"Well, I asked my sixteen year old neice to lend a hand, but she failed too,
even when she took it between her legs and squeezed it really hard."
"Her legs!" exclained the doctor, appalled.
"So I went next door to Eileen, and she tried too, first with both hands,
then both armpits in turn and she even tried rolling it between her knees,
but still nothing. "You asked your neighbour?" cried the shocked doctor.
"The old man replied, "Yes, but no matter what we tried we still couldn't
get that fucking jar open!"
doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me
back a semen sample tomorrow."
The next day the seventy-five-year old man reappeared at the doctor's
office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as he had
received it on the previous day.
"Where's the sample?" asked the Doctor.
"Well, doctor, it's like this," the man explained. "First I tried with my right
hand, but that didn't work. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.
Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her
left, still no joy. She even tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then
with her teeth out, and still nothing."
"I see.." said the Doctor dubiously. "Then what did you do?"
"Well, I asked my sixteen year old neice to lend a hand, but she failed too,
even when she took it between her legs and squeezed it really hard."
"Her legs!" exclained the doctor, appalled.
"So I went next door to Eileen, and she tried too, first with both hands,
then both armpits in turn and she even tried rolling it between her knees,
but still nothing. "You asked your neighbour?" cried the shocked doctor.
"The old man replied, "Yes, but no matter what we tried we still couldn't
get that fucking jar open!"
nickohmygod
Member
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
LOL LOL LOL Just thinking..........
We went for a stroll last nite after the WM got delivered......
Along the town path......
Wicky's AV reminded me LOL LOL LOL
There was a field of sheep and a Llama in the field as well LOL LOL LOL
Anyway the Llama had pinned down the sheep and was doin rude things
to it LOL LOL LOL
the Sheep wasnt amused LOL LOL LOL
All the other sheep seemed quite worried as well LOL LOL LOL
We went for a stroll last nite after the WM got delivered......
Along the town path......
Wicky's AV reminded me LOL LOL LOL
There was a field of sheep and a Llama in the field as well LOL LOL LOL
Anyway the Llama had pinned down the sheep and was doin rude things
to it LOL LOL LOL
the Sheep wasnt amused LOL LOL LOL
All the other sheep seemed quite worried as well LOL LOL LOL
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
wicky said:
He was chasing em and then this one just gave up running LOL LOL LOL
Light was fading a bit..... I woulda got my fone out and got a vid of it LOL LOL LOL
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
rockin_plumber said:
:err: Trying to tell little_rockin he wanted a piggy back as well
wicky
Moderator
Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around & saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, 'Why the spoon?'
'Well, 'he explained, 'the restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes.
After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.'
I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the waiter, 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?'
'Oh, certainly!' Then he lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned, also found out that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.
I asked 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?'
'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.'
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, 'Why the spoon?'
'Well, 'he explained, 'the restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes.
After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.'
I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the waiter, 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?'
'Oh, certainly!' Then he lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned, also found out that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.
I asked 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?'
'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.'
wicky
Moderator
three strangers strike up a conversation in the airport passenger lounge in Lubbock, Texas, while awaiting their flights. One is an American Indian passing through from Lame Deer. Another is a cowboy on his way to Houston for a livestock show. The third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab student, newly arrived at Texas Tech University from the Middle East.
Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures.
Soon, the two Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical Muslim and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull.
The cowboy leans back in his chair; crosses his boots on a magazine table; and tips his big, sweat-stained hat forward over his face.
Finally, the American Indian clears his throat and softly he speaks, 'At one time here, my people were many ....... but sadly, now we are few.'
The Muslim student raises an eyebrow and leans forward, 'Once my people were few,' he sneers, 'and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?'
The West Texas cowboy shifts his toothpick to one side of his mouth.....and from the darkness beneath his Stetson, says in a drawl, 'That's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslims yet
LOL
:err:
Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures.
Soon, the two Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical Muslim and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull.
The cowboy leans back in his chair; crosses his boots on a magazine table; and tips his big, sweat-stained hat forward over his face.
Finally, the American Indian clears his throat and softly he speaks, 'At one time here, my people were many ....... but sadly, now we are few.'
The Muslim student raises an eyebrow and leans forward, 'Once my people were few,' he sneers, 'and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?'
The West Texas cowboy shifts his toothpick to one side of his mouth.....and from the darkness beneath his Stetson, says in a drawl, 'That's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslims yet
LOL
:err:
rockin_plumber
The Plumber That Rocks
LOL LOL LOL